Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

How to Make a Girl Want You: 5 Tips to Make a Girl Want You

Monday, February 16th, 2009

Do you want to be the man that is very lucky when it comes to getting the girl? You know, the type that seems to get any girl he wants without barely even trying. Do you know how to make a girl want you?

It does not take a super stud or a young athlete to make the girl you like want you. You don’t have to be either one and you can still get her even if you’re bald and ugly. You just have to learn the ways of romance and how to get her. Here are five tips to get you started:

1. Developing a personality that exudes confidence and character

Having a confident personality is not only a core when it comes to success in love, but also in life. When you have the type of personality that shows enjoyment in life, motivation, confidence, fun, and activity people are drawn to you. When you have this type of personality you will look and feel healthier and you will be able to naturally generate the type of excitement that attracts women.

2. You have to make the girl feel comfortable and great around you

A girl will come back and spend more time around you if she likes the way she feels around you. You can make her feel great by listening to what she needs and giving it to her. This is how you can become part of the destiny that she is creating for her life and you can win her over by making her feel wonderful around you.

This has to be balanced with fun, laughter, some seriousness, some depth, and a good connection. If you can make her smile and laugh, then she will be more willing to talk about more serious things and she will probably even bring them up in conversation.

3. Get to know her first as a friend

You have to start as her friend and work your way up to boyfriend. Start by flirting with her and spending time with her as friends. After you have made a good connection you will be able to better judge whether she is right for you or not. Then, you can start thinking about asking her out and elevating the relationship to a new level.

4. Don’t talk about yourself only and ignore her feelings

You have to make sure you don’t sound too conceited or self-centered. Keep her involved in the conversation and make sure she knows she will be a part of your world.

5. Compliment on her best features.

Point out her best features and ignore any you may consider flaws. Compliment her on her cute dimples, her sexy smile, or her warm personality. Who doesn’t like to be flattered, but just make sure it’s genuine.

Finally, if you want to find the woman of your dreams and you want to know how to make a girl want you, then you have to set goals and go after them. Don’t give up and understand that the woman for you is out there and you just have to find her.

My Ex Left and Married Another Woman – How to Get Him Back

Monday, February 16th, 2009

If you are saying to yourself, “My ex left and married another woman,” you are in a club with thousands of other woman. While most of those women end up never getting back with the man they still love, that is because they are not armed with the knowledge of how to do so. I am going to arm you with that knowledge now.

Do you want to get your ex back? If this is something you want more than anything else right now, read on. You obviously have a large emotional investment in your relationship, and you may not be ready to just give up on the relationship. You may want to rekindle the love.

First, it is important to face the truth about your own thoughts and feelings. Do you still care deeply about him? If you just miss him for the security of having someone familiar around, that may not be enough. No, in order to have a real chance of getting him back, you need to still harbor a deep passion for him.

Next, you need to really come to terms with how he feels about you. Does he still, at some level, have that deep and great love for you? Maybe the two of you split up even though you still love each other because you argued too much, had different goals, managed your lives differently. If he still loves you deeply, keep reading. If not, you need to do everything you can to forget him and move on. End of story.

If you have decided that yours is a deep love that still exists to this day, you are able to free yourself to really start working on that which can bring you back together.

Think back to when you used to be together and were at your happiest. Did you take better care of yourself? Were you a happier, more cheerful person? Were you interesting and interested in life, being involved in many activities outside of your relationship?

If you are like most women, after you have been with your man for a while you start to change little by little. Maybe you do not take very good care of yourself anymore. Maybe you stopped being quite as interesting, falling into the same daily routine. If you really want to win him back, you need to become the person he fell in love with all over again.

Meanwhile, try to cultivate an independent, detached spirit. Give off the clear signal that you are fine on your own. This may sound like a paradox, but it is absolutely essential if you want to have any chance of getting him back. Then, when you do get together with your ex from time to time, use the past to your advantage. For instance, if there were some clothes of yours that he really liked you to wear, indulge him a bit and wear them. And, remind him of many of the positive experiences you used to have together. Talking about good times can bring forth his feelings of love and affection for you.

Finally, if you want to win your ex back, just be yourself. Whether or not he is really still in love with you is not within your power to control. But, by being yourself, either way you will come out of all of this a healthier, happier person. And, you just may find your way back into his arms.

Dating Tips for Guys: Effective Ways to Succeed With Hot Girls

Monday, February 16th, 2009

Come to think of it guys, have you ever measured your success ratio on the kind of girls you’re going into? For example, your success rate when it comes to hot girls. If you compare them to your success rate with the girls slightly below their level, you might find out for yourself that your success rate in hot girls are lower than that of the average ones.

What we think then is that these hot girls are more selective than the average ones. If you think about it, it does makes sense. But this sounds more like an excuse for us. Because these girls aren’t as choosy as what we’ve thought them to be. It is actually our own behavior that changes when it comes to these hot girls because of what we think they are. This may sound cliche but it is actually true. We just sometimes feel intimidated because of their appearance and maybe status in the society especially when they’re really popular.

So how do we deal with it? Here’s one specific way:

Every time you put a hot girl’s number on your phone, how do you store their names? We usually put something like, “Sexy Monique,” or “Scarlet Hot!” This kind of classification can affect our behavior in a subtle but negative way. For example, when you make a call to “Sexy Monique” you will feel more adrenaline than when you simply call “Monique.”

So here’s a dating advice from the pickup artist, Julian Foxx, its what he calls, “Reverse Classification.”

Whenever you get a hot girl’s phone number, look at her closely, and imagine what her juvenile class mates used to call her. If she’s got nice fake breast, may she was flat as board and they probably called her “wall chest” or something. If she’s tall and blonde, perhaps they called her “Monique Big Bird.”

Now that you get the idea, next step is to store her name in your phone in that way (Scarlet Wall Chest, Monique Big Bird, etc.).

It will not only reduce any anxiety you feel whenever you call her, but it will also lessen your anxiety towards her when you’re together. This can also help you gain more self-confidence and feel less intimidated around her.

Remember, these attractive girls are not really selective, its us who think that way and that’s what keeping our success rates with them low. There could be other ways to overcome this aside from the “Reverse Classification” method. More dating tips soon.

How Can You Win Back Your True Love?

Monday, February 16th, 2009

All alone? Maybe this is how you feel right now, but let me tell you something. In all actuality, you are not alone! There are thousands of other people out there that are in the same boat that you are in right this very second. Unfortunately, what you do next will determine if you stay here in this boat, or you make the right choices and get back into that other boat and win back your true love.

I am not sure why you are alone, but I am going to assume that you and your true love just broke up. Maybe you are the one that decided that it was time for a change, but if you are reading this, I am guessing that you are the one who was dumped. So I need you to ask yourself one question. What are you going to do to win back your true love? Are you going to stay at home in your sweatpants slowly consuming gallon after gallon of Rocky Road ice cream, or are you going to get your act together and do what you need to do to get your ex back?

I am going to hope and pray that you have decided to go with option number two because no one wants to see a person that goes on and on for what seems like forever with option one. So let’s say that you are ready to get going with option number two. What are you going to do now? What you need to do is come up with a game plan. You need to set boundaries for yourself, you need to set goals for yourself, and you need to make sure that you follow these to a T. Here is my suggestion to get you going on option two:

1. Go out and take care of yourself for a day! Get your hair done, get a manicure and a pedicure. Get yourself a spa treatment. Whatever it is that really makes you feel good about yourself, DO IT! Not only will this make you happy, but it is going to rebuild your confidence.

2. Go out with your friends. Let another guy buy you a drink. Dance to all of your favorite songs. Moving around and dancing are going to release endorphins into your body. These endorphins are going to make you feel really good, which is also going to aid in rebuilding your confidence.

3. Do not call, text, email, or bother your ex. For the first few weeks, let him wonder how you are doing. Even if you are feeling like crap, he does not need to know this. If he calls you, do not blow him off. Simply tell him that you are happy to hear from him. Tell him that you are going to be busy for the next week or so, but that maybe sometime next week you two can get together for a cup of coffee or something. This is gong to make him think about you non stop for over a week.

What you are doing here is taking care of you first. If he sees that you are confident and you are going to make the best out of any situation, he is going to desire you more than if you lay around and stick to option one which I mentioned earlier. I hope nothing but the best for you, and I hope that you succeed in your quest to win back your true love.

Win Your Girlfriend Back by Gaining Her Trust and Boosting Your Confidence

Monday, February 16th, 2009

If you have done something that has broken the trust in your relationship then you will need to work out how to make it better.

Trust is something that takes a long time to gain and only a few small seconds to completely destroy and although winning it back will be difficult, it can be done and there are a few things that will hopefully make it easier for you.

First of all to win your ex girlfriend back by gaining her trust you will need to give her time to get over the broken relationship and the hurt that she may be feeling. This can be as long as a few days and even a few months but either way you must remember to be patient and to let her ponder the situation by herself with the comfort of her friends and family. Once you have established this time apart you can then arrange some sort of meeting.

This meeting should be in a mutual place so not your place or hers and perhaps a café or a restaurant would be best for this? At this meeting the two of you will need to talk about what has happened and why it happened so that you can begin to gain her trust back. You must be honest at this meeting and accept the fact that winning her back will take time and patience on your part. From this point onwards, only the two of you can work it out.

If you have recently been ‘dumped’ by a girl that you really liked or loved then your confidence may have taken quite a bit of a knock. Perhaps the break up was a mean one with name calling and so on which has left you feeling down and insecure? If this is the case and you still want your lady back, then you first need to work on your confidence.

The main thing that you need to do at first is to step back and look at yourself and see the things that you never normally see. Perhaps your ex was right and you do need to buy yourself some nicer clothes? Whatever the case you need to distance yourself from your ex and concentrate on you. Go shopping, spend a bit of money, and make yourself feel better, do whatever it takes to get a smile out of that miserable face you have been sporting.

A great way to boost your confidence after a break up is to get yourself a new image. Not only will this make you feel better but it can also make you look more attractive to both your ex and other women out there and there is nothing like a few compliments to boost your self confidence.

Friends are the best way to get yourself a confidence boost and it should be these people that you spend time around. Let them help you in this journey and when you are feeling more confident, start the task of winning your ex back.

What Should I Do to Get My Ex Back After a Break-Up

Monday, February 16th, 2009

Anytime you break up with your true love, you usually go through a lot of painful emotions. You feel upset, depressed and hurt, and you really miss them. “What should I do to get my ex back?” becomes a question you will constantly ask yourself.

If you’re preoccupied with your lost relationship, wondering “what should I do to get my ex back?” then you need to follow this simple advice. By doing this, you will give yourself the best option for getting back with your true love.

First off, do not play games with your ex. This is a very important rule, but unfortunately many people resort to this during breakups because it gives them a sense of power. Many times if you feel that you can make your ex believe that you are really upset, or make them believe that you really do not care at all, this is manipulation. It might feel good to have that power at that time, but in the long run, you are really hurting what we are working so hard to fix.

All too often, people will act like they are dating someone new to try and make their ex jealous. Once again this is manipulation. Even if you feel good at the time being, more often than not, this is going to backfire and you may end up losing your ex forever. Once again, very counterproductive.

Avoid saying things that you do not mean. Unfortunately, this happens in any situation or any relationship, but sometimes the anger around a breakup makes us act more viciously than we normally might. Even if you’re hurt, you probably are asking yourself, ‘What should I do to get my ex back?” This shows that you’re ready to forgive that person. If you were not, you probably would not want your ex back, and you’d be glad it was over.

Now, think about how you’ve been acting. If you were your ex, would you look forward to spending time with you or talking to you? Or would you dread each time that you came around? You are going to be mad, you are going to be hurt, and you are going to want to argue. Do not let this happen! You need to work really hard at controlling all of your negative emotions and focus on being a person that they will miss.

“What should I do to get my ex back?” Be on your best behavior and make your ex remember what drew them to you in the first place. Force them to remember your good points. Then you’ll have a better chance of being able to get back together with your ex.

When you lose your true love, it is not going to be an easy road to get them back. It is going to take time and well thought out planning and implementation. This is a good starting point. If you can focus on this information, you will be well on your way to get your ex back.

Accepting Separation From Spouse and How to Move On

Monday, February 16th, 2009

For many people, accepting a separation from your spouse and moving on is one of the hardest things you can do. In fact, the only cases in which doing this is easy is when things are so bad that you cannot wait to exit the situation and move on with your life. A breakup with your spouse can disrupt the flow of your whole life. You may be reminded of your spouse wherever you go, especially if you share many mutual friends.

One of the biggest challenges you have to overcome when you are ready to move on is the relationships your friends have with your spouse. In particular, if your spouse is popular with your friends, you may have a tough time trying to get them to accept the situation and to stop asking you questions about the status of your relationship. If you and your spouse often spent time with the same group of people, then your attending parties or get-togethers by yourself (without your spouse) will seem strange to them at first. Still, it is very important that you continue to maintain a strong relationship with your friends. Do not let your falling out with your spouse interfere with your close friendships.

If you find that you and your spouse share a lot of mutual friends, some of your friends may choose to “side” with your spouse. You may find that you have to actually give up some of those friendships, especially if they end up trying to choose between you and your spouse. While this can be painful, it’s probably best for everyone involved and could make life a lot easier for everyone.

It is similar with your family as it is with your friends. In a sense, your family is an extension of yourself. Therefore, your breakup with your spouse can be surprisingly difficult for your family members to deal with, as well. To overcome any temptation they have to try to influence your current situation with your spouse, keep drawing your family’s attention to the fact that things are really over with your spouse. Since your family supports and loves you, they will eventually come around and see it your way.

Accepting separation from spouse is sometimes just too difficult when you’re surrounded by mutual friends. If you can, take a vacation and get away from the same scene and people for a while. Or, take a vacation with a friend who is totally disconnected from the situation and does not even know your spouse. Doing this can help you get some perspective on your situation.

Accepting the reality of your separation from your spouse may be one of the hardest things you have ever had to do. Still, you need to be strong during this tough time. Realize that, as much as your friends and family may still care about your spouse, they still love you and want to support what is best for you. Give yourself a bit of time alone or with a close friend, and in the meantime, trust that everything will eventually right itself. Remember to stay strong and true to your beliefs and values.

Should I Break Up With My Girlfriend? 7 Questions to Ask Yourself

Monday, February 16th, 2009

If your relationship with your girlfriend has not been going well lately and you are not feeling fulfilled like you used to, you may be asking yourself, “Should I break up with my girlfriend?” When things are not going satisfactorily in a relationship, a breakup often seems like the best choice in terms of ending your own pain and misery quickly.

On the other hand, a breakup can also bring its own type of pain – especially if you still love your girlfriend deeply. Rather than rush into a breakup and possibly make a mistake in the process, first ask yourself these 7 questions.

1 – Have you ever cheated on her?

If you have ever been unfaithful to your girlfriend by heavily flirting, dating or sleeping with one or more other women, that is a sign that you probably do not care deeply enough for your girlfriend to sustain a long-term relationship. Consider moving on.

2 – Do you find yourself having to not act yourself when she is around?

It is essential that you date or have a serious relationship with someone with whom you can truly be yourself. Ask yourself whether this is true in your current relationship.

3 – Do the two of you argue more than twice per week?

If you argue frequently, such as more than twice per week, you and your girlfriend are exhibiting a lot of pent-up frustration, resentment, or anger toward each other. You need to get to the bottom of these feelings if you are going to make things work between the two of you.

4 – Does the thought of breaking up cross your mind more than once per day?

If your thoughts often turn to that of breaking up with your girlfriend, you may be yearning to do it but just need to get the courage to make the decision to break up for good. Listen to what your heart is saying.

5 – Do you respect who she is as a person?

It is very important to be with someone whom you respect. If you do not respect your girlfriend because of who she is and how she acts, think again about spending any more of your life with her.

6 – Do you keep waiting for the relationship to right itself?

Sometimes when things are not going well in a relationship, it is easy to want things to get better naturally without any effort on your part. Give up this fantasy. If you want to fix things, you need to take a proactive approach.

7 – In your mind’s eye can you envision your lives apart?

If the thought of being apart from your girlfriend for the rest of your life makes you feel happy and free instead of depressed and lonely, consider breaking up and as soon as possible.

Hopefully, your pondering these questions has given you some insight into how you really feel about your girlfriend. Now, it is time to make some hard choices to either leave her or put renewed effort into making the relationship work.

Emotional Incest: Will He or She Change?

Monday, February 16th, 2009

Sharon, one of the members of our website, emailed me asking me to write more on abuse, particularly covert incest. She was in the process of ending her 4-year marriage with her covertly abusive husband, who is emotionally incestuous with his adult daughter.

“There is no physical involvement, but the only person my husband feels safe with is his daughter. He has used her to ‘dump’ about our marriage and about his problems. So his daughter is his caretaker, getting the only kind of closeness she can, by being there for him but never getting what she really needs.”

As a result, his daughter is now a very angry adult who has many problems in relationships.

I asked Sharon to describe to me her experience of the emotional incest.

“Neither of them take responsibility for themselves or their behavior, so when I came along I suddenly became the one who was at the core of EVERY problem in their lives. Everything became my fault. It was my fault the daughter became angry, it was my fault he withdraws.

“If I had understood the depth of this ‘sickness’ and that the likelihood of him even wanting to work through any of it was nil, I would have said ‘next’ immediately. Any parent is going to be protective of their child, but to cling to a child to meet your emotional needs is just not something most people (that I know) realize even exists. We all hear and read about incest with sexual involvement, but nothing about this. It’s like incest without the sex.”

Throughout her marriage, Sharon hoped that, through therapy, her husband would see what was happening and change. It took her 4 years to realize that he was completely uninterested in changing.

“In a recent article you wrote about abuse, both covert and overt, your last paragraph said abusers rarely change, or something to that effect. That’s the part that people need to understand – that abuse is like a tumor with tentacles that are very difficult to detach, and that abusers really don’t want to ‘deal with it’ and typically don’t, because their whole world and identity will crumble. ”

Sharon wishes she had known that it was unrealistic to expect her husband to change. “I would love to help someone not endure the emotional pain I did for as long as I did.”

Abuse has many faces – verbal, physical, sexual, and emotional. Abusers are often experts at appearing open to learning and changing, which is part of their covert abuse. It is vitally important for people at the other end of abuse to give up expecting an abuser to change. Even attending therapy, as Sharon’s husband did with her, is not an indication that they are willing to change. Often, attending therapy is just another form of manipulation to get you to stay in the abusive relationship – and another way to point the finger at you as being the cause of the problems.

If someone says they are going to change but no change actually occurs, then you need to accept that the appearance of openness is a form of crazymaking, a form of abuse. You need to accept that there is NOTHING YOU CAN DO to get them to change. You either need to accept the situation as it is, or leave it. Expecting change and trying to bring about change will only cause you more pain.

Saint Valentines: Romantic Things to Do With Your Soul Mate

Monday, February 16th, 2009

Do you want to find something different to do with your beloved one on Saint Valentines? Depending on your financial availabilities as well as climate there are several different Saint Valentines ideas for you to consider. In this article, you will find some ideas on the things to do for Saint Valentines that will help you select the one that meets your needs.

Maybe you you have the great chance to live in a relatively warm climate during what is, for many of us, a freezing winter month you can surprise your beloved oneby bringing her to a lovely secluded forested place and have a romantic, sumptuous picnic lunch for two simply under the trees, or perhaps next to the placid waters of a lake. If you live in a freezing area you maybe want to opt for having a mini trip in a nice little cabin up in the hills, the countryside or even on the beach and have a few romantic hours snuggling in front of a roaring hearth, drinking some champaign, wine, or just some hot chocolate while you spend hours and hours in in the arms of your beloved one.

If you really want to get excessive, what do you think of having a wonderful cruise to the Bahama’s or the Caribbean? Perhaps a trip to Hawaii? While the rest of the world is still dealing with the cold and chilly days of winter, you and your beloved one could lounge on the beautiful beaches tanning under the tropical sun. On the other hand if you and your beloved one appreciate the winter time and its particularities you would like to have a move to a ski resort. After the winter activities you will surely enjoy a little rest in front of a roaring fire, drinking a hot chocolate and listening to romantic music. Valentine’s Day is a great time to plan a first honeymoon, or even a second one.

Being on a small budget won’t prevent you from having a wonderful Valentine’s Day: it’s the right time to be really imaginative and surprise your beloved one! If you and your special one are juggling charges, professional responsibilities, children, etc., and a cruise or a trip abroad is something you can not afford to pay, why not try sending the children to a relative’s house for the night and prepare a dinner for two, rent some “adults only” movies, and spend a really lusty and romantic night at home. Perhaps play some “adults only” games and drink some champaign while sitting in front of the hearth or snuggling in bed reading sexy tales to each other while drinking some brandy. Even while on a small budget, with a little imagination you can make an extraordinary Valentine holiday. There is a myriad of different ideas!

Whether you choose to go for a cruise or to celebrate Valentine’s Day at home with your beloved one, have fun and enjoy the time you spend together and have a happy Valentine’s Day!